504 Quotes About Joke

When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.

For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.

Yo Mama’s so ugly, her dentist treats her by mail order.

Being a Muslim is not a joke but a challenge. If you think it is, come and live in Pakistan where you will know about Muslims' enemies around the globe

Death would not surprise us as often as it does, if we let go of the misbelief that newborns are less mortal than the elderly.

The answer to the question ‘How many children do you have?’ and the one to the question ‘How many children are you raising?’ are not identical in all cases: some men are not taking care of their own children, some are knowingly or unknowingly raising other men’s children, and some do not even know that they each have a child, another child, or other children.

I don’t like seeing you hit.”“Well, to be quite honest, I don’t like being hit unless it’s by you.” As soon as it was out of my mouth, I realized what I had said. “That sounded all sorts of wrong.”“Insanely so, actually.”“To be clear,” I said to any overhearing ears, “I hit him back--”“Hard.”“It’s a very give-and-take, non-abuse type hitting situation…”The sides of Liam’s mouth folded up like an accordion. “You should probably stop now.”“I’m trying. My mouth keeps moving of its own accord.