146 Quotes About Puns

But the helmet had gold decoration, and the bespoke armorers had made a new gleaming breastplate with useless gold ornamentation on it. Sam Vimes felt like a class traitor every time he wore it. He hated being thought of as one of those people that wore stupid ornamental armor. It was gilt by association.

Fuck, Christina.”“Yes, fuck Christina. I think she'd like that.

People ask me where I got my x-ray powers. I inherited them from my parents in parental supervision. Erase the dots and your doubts if you think that I was 'raysed' alone.

Anyway, my writer gang: they kind of did their comedy apprenticeship with me and, during that period, when they were young and impressionable, I think I infected them with my pun virus. They grew to enjoy puns, think puns, just as much as me. The problem is people don't really like puns any more, so I worry I've rendered the poor fuckers virtually unemployable.

Well, you can’t spell ridiculous without dic—

Jasper set an intercepting course towards that Rhylonian Star Duster. Maybe we can catch them on their blind side.”“Doesn’t this ship have a cloak?” Jaq asks.“Miss Synergy, I don’t know what they teach now a’days at the Academy, but ships do not wear clothes.

Jasper!” Casey shouts, startling the young woman. “My cargo is talking to me!

She points to where he went and looks to the neutral Baumen. “He—he did that to me on purpose! He’s insane. Literally, insane!”The munchkin just shrugs. “Welcome aboard!” and returns unconcerned to his work.

You could paint yourself in blood and wear leaves in your hair, and I would deny you nothing as long as you came to me when I asked.”He looked at her, piercingly.“You’d look pretty with leaves in your hair.”“What about the Council?”“Leaves aren’t part of the uniform, I’m afraid.” He nipped at her ear. “Though they do like to rest on their laurels.