1,006 Quotes About Satire

...And of course they'll get their milk from us, because Gooch's milk in the village really can't be trusted. I do hope, Henry, the vicarage drains are all right if Martin is to go there, because the French are rather vague about drains.''Yes, but darling, they aren't bringing their drains with them'...

Many millions of pregnancies—many if not most of which have each led to the birth of at least one child—were each used as nothing but a conspicuous means to a secret end called the evasion of abortion.

We the living are to blame for the painfulness of being dead.

Most sexually adventurous women want a man who regards cunnilingus as a basic woman right.

Most people who are would each not be in love with their partner, if they did not have the kind of genitals they have.

Some kleptomaniacs do not steal things only; they also, while some only, steal lovers.

Some people would not have remained with their partners, if the unfortunate things that have happened to them had happened to their partners, or if the fortunate things that have happened to their partners had happened to them.

He beseeches us pitiably for funds, donations, alms, and oblations so as to grow and nourish his noble monolith. Called "Wikipedia," it's a publicly built superencyclopedia. It is our obligation to bankroll it, he says: without Wikipedia we would just revert to our former status of cave-men, larvae, algae, and scum.

Unless it is you, finding out who your lover’s dream lover is is a nightmare.