1,006 Quotes About Satire

Some women’s greatest achievement is sleeping with a man who is rich, famous, and/or wanted by many women, whereas some women’s greatest achievement is refusing to sleep with such a man.

By drinking, a boy acts like a man. After drinking, many a man acts like a boy.

Some disabled people spend a significant amount of their energy on trying to come across as abled or as not that disabled.

I don’t even pretend to believe I know everything; I just believe in arguments God told me I had a pretty good chance of winning, while I was traveling through hell.

There is no point in feeling like a huge disappointment because that’s your parents’ job. Let them be disappointed in you and let them compete with their friends in a weekly round of Whose Child is the Worst. In fact, let them win a round or two.

In many cases, it was the woman’s stomach—not her heart—that fell for her man.

In some cases, it is the woman’s stomach—not her heart—that has left her man for another.

Many a survivor of a plane crash who is or was against cannibalism and had never eaten human flesh once found themselves in a situation where they had to either eat human flesh, or go the way of all flesh.

We, in the interest of the so-called progress, have been persuaded to leave the production and at times the cooking of our food to companies whose owners and employees make a living by exploiting our busyness or laziness and our innate hunger to continue living.