38 Quotes About Fart

When you are with any of the vast majority of sane people who can talk, silence is usually as infrequent—and definitely as brief—as the sound of a fart.

No adult is ever too far from a fart.

I want to do it too!” said Gazzy, sitting very, very quietly, completely motionless.“Nope,” said Nudge, shaking her head. “You stand out like a fart in church.

I swear by the self-assurance with which elderly men sitting in public tilt sideways to allow the gas to escape loudly.

What happened next… well, I'm going to blame it on the fact that I was scared. And I had just flown or fallen or something through about eighty years worth of Time. Or maybe it was the beans. I farted. I farted loud enough that it echoed around the small closet, bounced off all four walls and finally escaped through the open door. At least that's what it did in my mind's eye.

Wait!" said Erbrechen, suddenly feeling jovial. "I change my mind. Never shite again. Ever. Anywhere."It was a small thing, but of such small things were life's joys truly made. The thought, he knew, would keep him smiling for days."The world is a comedy, intoned Erbrechen, tittering, "and each must play his fart.

Most people would rather eat inside a windowless room in which they have just defecated than eat inside one in which someone else has just farted, even if the room does not have a toilet.

A fart in the face is love.

There's a place for farts, and there's a place for sharts.