286 Quotes About Funny-but-true

Wise men don't feel companionless when they are not in the company of their egos.

Little people make tall claims. As being this-that avatar or messiah. Some even say they're God. Well, if they are, I'm their grand-pop.

So, am I too, like all other humans, just a rogue? Sure! Just a notch less than those rascals wearing godly robes.

There is no human-like god. If there were, he'd be as silly as you.

Do not believe in a god who is as silly, and meaner than you. For, that would surely be your higher-self, and your stupid alter-ego.

Humans, left to own misguided devices, scratches the Divine in the self as one would the lice, but remember to lick well all the vices.

Most people are scumbags. Accept it. Let go. Chill out, douchebags.

Children throw tantrums because they've imagined their 'father in heaven' does so. And because, their inherited religious book has, in written, shown them so.

She shuddered. “What is it with slobbery kissers? Are they trying to drown us in spit? I mean, Jesus, swallow every now and then.